Sunday, April 01, 2007

KDE4 gets HOTTER Hot Nude Stuff

Since KDE 3.3 was released in 2004, KDE applications have used the KnuDELibs library KNewPorn to implement a simple interface for downloading and installing nudie pictures from a centralized server. Its successor, KNudeStuff 2 (KNS 2), is gearing up to give KDE 4 users new options for uninstalling content, content synchronization, the ability to rate content directly from the application interface, a dramatically faster interface, and more. KudeStuff 2 will be compliant with the FreePorn.org GetHotNudeStuff specification (GHNS), developed as a cross-desktop standard based on the original KNudeStuff design.

Like its predecessor, KNS 2 will act as a sort of way to bypass the whole web-browser, search engine, bittorrent, amule gamut users are faced with when attempting to locate quality porn. Furthermore KNS 2 adds support for Video downloads, live feeds, and an innovative new "Boss Key" API (BKA) designed to allow almost instant hiding of incriminating content at the press of a button, or a gesture of the mouse, or even - assuming the user has a webcam - a simple wave of the hand. well, there's nothing worse than having to keep one hand on the mouse/keyboard just in case somebody wanders by...

KNS 2 will introduce Desktop Xxxchange Service (DXS) support. DXS is a brilliant new method of sharing your favourite content without all that mucking about in file sharing applications. KNS 1 allowed you to notify your friends of "Really Neat Pron" (RNP) using a web based content rating system. By using RNP/DXS (RNP "over" DXS), content providers will be able to integrate this rating system directly into applications by using a CGI-like script (CGI = Common Gawking Interface). If application developers support DXS, users will be able to upload content ratings and even leave text comments without having to open a web browser, or identify themselves (Finally, phew). Additionally, DXS integration will add support for content searching by body part (size, shape, flexibility, firmness, weight) and allow users to "subscribe" to content and be notified of updates. Never again will you miss out on part 25 of that 25 part series you have been studiously downloading every three days.

KNudeStuff2 will be included in KnuDELibs for KDE 4. Lead developer Josef <Does not want his name associated with this article > (DNWHNAWTA) is already well into the coding of KNS 2. He quips, "There is already more fantastic porn available than its predecessor had, although more might not always be better. On the other hand, you can never have too many photos of titties." He is currently working to integrate KNudeStuff with the SVN development version of KnuDELibs 4, marking the implementation of basic downloading and uploading (and downloading and uploading, and downloading and uploading and...) functionality. DNWHNAWTA plans to release a highly anticipated nude developer tutorial soon.

(With apologies to LWN)

13 comments:

carl said...

Great. For the ladies, they can use this Hot Nude App on April Tools Day

Anonymous said...

Finally a reason to use KDE!!

Anonymous said...

You snivvelling Troll, you!

You deliberately didn't mention the great new KIO slave that comes with GHNS: kio_p0rn let's you ondulate your wankonness over every net connection you can imagine.

And you suppressed this important info by highlighting all the wrong things! Go away.

phraedus said...

You americans are a day behind, and it is very confusing for us australians, that had all of our fun yesterday. When did it become april 2nd fools day?

Ben said...

Carl:
April Tools Day. Brilliant :)

anonymous:
I do not respond to anonymous comments, but if I did it might go something like this...

Yes I did indeed neglect to mention the KIO slaves, but that was entirely deliberate. You see, this is a family blog and I will not discuss all that weird S&M stuff.

"And you suppressed this important info by highlighting all the wrong things!" I resent that. What could be more important than the Boss Key API (BKA)?

Phraedus:
I am not American. I am Australian. I posted this on April 1st. There must be some kind of time-dilatory malfunction in your brain. Please consult a qualified Time Lord.

Windfall Woman said...

After all this techie beating, I thought I'd tiptoe in CF and rescue you. Consider yourself rescued.

Ben said...

I do so consider. Thank you.

Although, and let me make this perfectly clear, I am waaaaaaaaaaaaay too manly to ever need rescuing. Or directions. I definitely do not need to stop for directions.

Windfall Woman said...

I can't even think of a witty comeback. You are truly so manly. I worship at the altar of your manliness.

Ben said...

Naturally. :)

Windfall Woman said...

Naturally or unnaturally. Giggles.

Ben said...

:)

World Domination said...

You should have a look to Pornbuntu :
http://devloop.lyua.org/blog/index.php?2007/04/01/426-pornbuntu-la-distribution-linux-qui-vous-fait-du-bien
;-)

Ben said...

Outrageously good!
I must have Pornbuntu, now.